Shia LeBeouf....................Jet

Oh my oh my. I love me some Shia. Damn guys he even makes me spit dope rhymes. Seriously, all rappin aside, this man will marry me one day whether he likes it or not.He is so hot. Awwh shit I did it again! Why Shia you ask? I know some of you think girls only fantasize about guys like Brad and Leo. Sure they're pretty but most of us have crushes on real looking guys, down to earth seeming guys. There are plenty of qualities we find far more attractive then your average blonde hair, blue eyed, ripped abs variety.Shia's damn talented and is in one of my favorite movies of all time "A Guide to Recognizing your Saints".In this movie he fights and he cries, two of my favorite things to watch a boy do. I like to see a black eye and a swollen lip all covered in tears every once in a while! I looooove him. He's so smart,bruiting and sensitive. He used to be on Nikeloden and now he's wearing a wife beater riding the subway while his friend gets shot....delicious! Although you can't see it in this picture Mr.LeBeouf is also the frequently proud owner of the Jew Fro, one of the most attractive possessions of all mankind. I really want to do a scene with him in some dark indie filmwhere he's in high school and I'm his college aged tutor and I get arrested for statutory rape.

DANI FROM TILA TEQUILA.......Star

Usually the WG Celebrity Man Crush is reserved for strictly well, Men, but for you Dani -the gorgeous firefighter who is vying for Tila Tequila's heart, the Wing Girls will make an excemption. Dani - ever since I started watching you on TV, I can't get you out of my head. Those eyes. That humongous smile with your great big white teeth. Your big strong arms. The way you throw yourself into a pool of chocolate syrup with such reckless abandon. It's enough to make a girl question her heterosexuality. I've been thinking about this a lot and I think you would make the perfect boyfriend. You are so strong and brave and yet you're sensitive and a good listener. You care about your partner and are never too aggressive or touchy-feely. You have impeccable technique in the kissing department. You know to put your hand on the lower part of Tila's head- right above the neck. Oh she's so lucky and I'm not even sure she knows it! Dani, I'm just gonna put it out there. If Tila isn't enough of a woman for you, the Wing Girls are here-- to hold you and stroke your hair and put your face between our gigantic breasts. Just remember that, Dani Boy.

Love,

Star

PS: Is it wrong that I really want to put mascara on you and dress you up in a Little Bo Peep outfit, with lace and garters and heels? Yes, yes it is. But I can't help it. I'm sorry.

Michael Rapaport.............Jet

Last night Star and I were at Swingers, oh, I mean, our "secret work booth" in a" top secret" locale, and we ran into what I consider one of the hottest men alive. Yes that's right Michael Rapaport. I know he's not necessarily a popular favorite among girls my age, but girls my agelike that homosexualRyan Phillipe, so what the fuck do they know? I have this special itch for albino ass white dudes who act all gansta.Absolutely no idea where this came from, no idea, but it's here and believe me guys I'm not alone. He just owns his shit. He's like "True I can't be out in any direct sunlight, but I'll kick your fuckin ass and then give my bro Kevin a high five." Maybe if we were going out he would need to borrow my spf 30 chap stick to prevent further freckles from forming on his translucent lips, but then he would use them to make out with me so it wouldn't matter. Unfortunately from what we saw last night he is married to some cute punk rock chick, only making him cooler, and has what Star and I deemed a shit load of kids, mainly four year olds. He seemed like such a good daddy and one of his off-springhad like a hipster Mohawk/Mullet. He asked me if I wanted one of them to take home. I wanted to say "Yes but one that isn't already born, and one with my DNA in it too." Then I wanted to laugh wickedly and rub my hands together...Star wouldn't let me. Damn, why are all the good ones married and incapable of taking a vacation to Mexico or Hawaii?

Jack Black...............Jet

I love Jack Black. Some girls might disagree but I don't give a shit.I can't help it. He's just so unbelievably dreamy to me. And there is a lot more to him thenthe fact that he's the funniest man on earth with out even trying. For instance I like his sweaty forehead. I like how self-deprecating he seems to be. I just love him. He's smart. He'sgot a killer voice. He's confident. Heis so high energy.He's passionate. He would be my perfect match. I wanted him to be my husband but he got married to some lady that isn't me. Now what am I goina do?